Friends....and then there are FRIENDS

We are very sorry - Everybody wondering what we've been doing that's so much fun we didn't have time to blog or facebook or tweet or call or text.....So let me explain. Last week, Clare watched an episode of The Hills, she kind of liked it, so with a new season starting this week, she Tivo'd it. But she Tivo'd the entire five seasons so we haven't actually left the house for day. Heidi, Spencer, Audrina, Justin Bobby....it's tragic but it's true. ANYTHING CAN BE ADDICTIVE haha
So, back to real life, our life, and watching The HIlls and friends coming and going and fighting and making up - living in this town it is kind of easy to be disappointed by people sometimes. Maybe it's the same the world over, but it does seem to be particularly difficult here, finding good friends, who really are your friends and don't just want something more, like for you to read their script or introduce them to somebody, or a host of other things above and beyond just friendship. The way to navigate the disappointment of finding out someone has an ulterior motive or agenda is to not really have that high an expectation in the first place and to have your core inner circle of friends who are your REAL FRIENDS and then all the other people who are your social friends. Your inner core, your peeps, your true true friends are the handful of people that are in the inner circle, who you trust with your secrets, trust with seeing you at your worst, trust with your life sometimes and who have proven that they won't let you down. They are in it for the long haul, warts and all, good and bad...
kind of like a marriage. These are the people you would ask to help you bury a body at worst, or pick you up from the airport at best, or just listen to you vent, or look after your dog (they would have to be very good friends for that), all that sort of stuff you wouldn't ask an acquaintance. As Tennessee Williams said “Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.”
Right in the centre of Clare's circle is Paul....he's her buoy. Yes I spelt it that way for a reaon, he's her buoy, he keeps her afloat when the water gets rough and deep, he's always there to hold on to and rely on and get strength from and tread water, then at other times she swims away and round and under, but she knows he's always there bobbing right nearby. Then there are the other rocks in her circle and then there's all the other friends, the ones you might hang out with at Soho House on a Friday, there's nothing wrong with them at all, you just know that you'd feel awkward asking them for a favour, or to help you with something, or to take you to the doctor's when you're not feeling well, they're not really that sort of friend.
And let me tell you, all friends are good, all the different levels and degrees of friendship are awesome. A friend is a friend, it's just that sometimes you're sitting at a table and look across at somebody you have known forever and just get such a safe and wonderful and secure feeling from knowing that they've got your back. Because at the end of the day, that's a real friend, someone you know if you were being badmouthed would stick up for you and defend you, who wouldn't think badly of you if you messed up once in a while, someone who sets their alarm to hike with you in the mornings so we can play with their dogs, that's a real friend. Had a weekend of them - Ry and Simon being two of the best friends you could ever ask for, all three Kate's (Clare's triumverate), Matthew, Johnny, Brian and the stags (a group of boys cooler than the flipside of her pillow :) and always there, Sadie, Emma and Tasha (the best girlfriends for girly talk and help with girly decisions) and on and on.....and there are a lot of them I can't name, but they know who they are and how much they mean......so this blog's for you my friends.....here's to you :)